Take That mania

Mummy's gone crazy. I know it was only a matter of time, but she really is mad.
Some bunch of blokes called Take That who sing a bit, are 'on tour' whatever that means, and Mummy had a ticket to see them. She jumped up and down a lot, and 'whoop whooped'. When she said that she was going to Cardiff to see them, I thought she'd take me along to revisit my hometown. But no. Apparently I wouldn't enjoy Cardiff on Take That show night. Really? Selfish.
So, AS & UD were drafted in to look after me for the day while Mummy sloped off, whooping and bouncing about like Tigger on acid.
She's got the 'hots' (shudder) for Gary, and says that his designer stubble and racing-snake-like physique makes him look better than ever before. If you ask me, the guy could stand to eat a few cocktail sausages, and his 'designer stubble' looks like the bum-fluff that's growing back on my belly since my last operation. Now that's a 'look'!
So having put up with "Progressed" in the cd player every day, I was expecting her to get back from the gig, having bounced it all out of her system. But no! Instead, what does she do ? She only goes and gets more ruddy tickets !! This time for Wembley! Seriously, the woman's gone mad.
AND.............get this !!!!!!! She only goes and ropes AS into the ruddy thing too. So now, not only am I getting Take That cds and dvds playing on a loop several times every day at home, whenever I escape to the 'relative' normality of next door, AS is blasting the cd in the kitchen or playing the Circus tour dvd in the lounge. There really is NO escape from these guys. I know all the words to the latest cd, and these days when I dream, I'm rowing one of those boats during "The Flood", or stomping round in riot gear to "Kidz" or becoming a mutant whilst belting out "Love Love" . Daddy come back and save me from this crazy.

So, off they go, Mummy and AS, to Wembley, Mummy wearing a hugely age-inappropriate TT t-shirt (in my opinion). I stayed home with UD and waved them off with them literally shaking from excitment, and UD and I settled down to a (now very rare) Take That-free day. We watched a bit of telly and had a snooze, then had some food and a snooze. Then I took UD for a walk, and we came back and had a little snooze. Next thing Mummy & AS get home, STILL bouncing like fools and singing Love Love. Mummy was besides herself with excitement as expected and babbled on and on about the concert, how wonderful it (Gary) was, how well they (Gary) sang, how great they (he) looked, etc etc etc. Seriously Mummy, STOP. But the biggest surprise was AS! She seemed to have really really enjoyed the whole thing, and (to my and UD's dismay) may just have become a Take That fan! Dog help us! Now there really is no escape.
And just when you think its all over, Mummy Gwynneth & Daddy Malcolm come to stay, and Mummy decides that they can get MORE tickets to the last show of the tour!
AS was totally on board with this crazy decision. But luckily, when it came to actually getting the tickets, Mummy and AS decided that they needed to be satisfied with 1 (or Mummy's case 2) Progress Live experience, and they didn't buy the tickets.
Unfortunately, to compensate for 'missing out' on the last night of the UK tour, Mummy is now playing the cds and dvds on an ever-increasing loop. Every ruddy day, Take That. I'd like to shut Gary Barlow up with a cocktail sausage in his 'bumfluff' covered mouth ! Give me a bit of peace to have a proper (Take That free) snooze ! Then again, the songs are growing on me, and I wouldn't really want to waste a good snorker. So, I think I'll just let Mummy carry on with her Take That fetish, and I'll just need to have a little Patience.............